Roadside Highlights: Tyler, TX

If you are anything like me then you agree that it's the odd roadside attractions that make a trip go from good to great. The weirder and more arbitrary, the better. But, like me, you might not think that they all deserve their own blog entry. If that's the case then you might group several geographically approximate roadside attractions into one blog entry.

What a coincidence, so did I!

And since I was recently in Tyler, TX, let's start there.  Awhile back I visited  the historical markers and memorials in downtown's courthouse square but there was one we missed. It is under this unassuming tree on the southeast corner of the square:

And it memorializes Tyler's most beloved squirrel, "Shorty."

Shorty was the beloved courthouse mascot and upon his tragic passing he was honored with this tombstone.

And if dead animals are your thing, you can find plenty at the Brookshire's World of Wildlife Museum:

I was going to go on and on about the seemingly endless displays of exotic taxidermy but there is clearly one stand out:

Yes, "Monkeys Playing Monopoly" is truly a work of art and is eerily reminiscent of a recurring childhood nightmare I used to have quite a while ago.  Take a moment to soak in all the elaborate details, from each player's individual name takes to the one monkey brandishing a "Get Out of Jail Free" card.

If that's not enough animal hi-jinks for you then stroll down Teddy Bear Lane in the Children's Park to see two giant "wrestling" teddy bears.

It's a nice little park that's hidden away yet relatively close to downtown...and it has giant cavorting teddy bears that look like they're straight out of a Bjork video.  Can't beat that.

Lastly, when you are on your way out of town you can stop and get some coffee at Kickerz.  It's easily identified from the road because...well, you know.

This one is technically in Whitehouse, TX which is just south of Tyler but the draw of a giant hat shaped coffee shop is easy motivation for the 5 minute drive. I recently learned that they are hoping to start a franchise so I'm sure that cowboy hat shaped buildings will soon start popping up everywhere.

And that would be awesome.

Dallas-Opoly is Kind of Lame

At some point, on a birthday or at Christmas, you have probably received a themed version of Monopoly from a well intentioned relative.  Regardless of your varied interests, there is most likely a version of the popular board game meant to stuff your stocking.  To further our speculation, you probably opened it once, maybe even played it, and then put it on the shelf reserved for things you never touch.

All that preamble is to bring up the topic of "Dallas-opoly," which I found at Walmart recently.  Admittedly, expectations were high.  Perhaps too high to live up to.  Upon cracking open the box here is a professionally photographed marketing picture representing what I found:

The upside includes that all properties have been renamed as Dallas locations (with the exception of the Mesquite Rodeo which is included for some reason).  For example, the famed locations of "Boardwalk" & "Park Place" are now Reunion Tower and Fair Park.  Here's a look at some of the deeds:

Great shout-outs to locations in the city but other than the names, that's about it.  No location pictures, or specific information is added to the game and they all seem to be arbitrarily assigned to groups.  Additionally, the traditional "Chance" and "Community Chest" cards are replaced with "Contingency" and "Big Fun" cards.  Many of them aren't Dallas-specific but here's a sample that are:

My final complaint, and biggest disappointment, is the game pieces.  The totally generic tokens include a hand (maybe for Big Tex's hand?), a star (Lone Star, ok I get it but c'mon), a heart, a cowboy boot and a cowboy hat.  Sure, some of these can be related to Dallas but you can't tell me that most of these don't show up in Houston-opoly or even Sante Fe-opoly. 

There are surely better choices that specifically relate to Dallas and even though no one asked me I decided to make suggestions:

Making the pieces Reunion Tower, the Woofus, the Dallas Zoo Giraffe, the Pegasus, the Chapel of Thanksgiving and Big Tex would have gone a long way towards saving this game.  I can only hope that the makers of "Dallas Scrabble" and "Dallas Candyland" are taking note of this.